14 weeks

Had my 14 week appt yesterday. I only put on 3 lbs. so far. That is huge for me since usually I have put on at least 15 by now. Pee on a stick test went fine, blood pressure is good, it was so fun to hear the heart beat. The nurse heard it, and asked me if I did. I told her barely and she found it for me and it was good and strong.

I am measuring 2 weeks ahead, which means I am measuring like I am 16 weeks along. My Dr. was looking at my chart and was asking me to refresh him on Eli's birth and asked about some of his health problems, his nerve injury in particular. He said it was possible with him being so big that his nerves could have been injured simply by the vaginal delivery and possibly having to tweak his shoulders to get him here.  He also said we want to avoid that happening again and since baby is measuring ahead we are going to do an Ultrasound at 38 weeks to check for babies weight and may go the route of c-section if baby is extremely big again.

I feel at peace with that decision, as I would do anything to help this baby avoid any of the struggles Eli has had. I have often wondered if we would have just opted for a c-section with Eli if things would have been a little better for him, but it could not matter either way, and that this is Eli's package of challenges that he has been given.

Physically I am feeling great, but I am kind of a quiet grouch sometimes. Things annoy me more easily than they normally do. I don't like to let people see I am being grouchy and feel embarrassed when they do. It will be happy when I feel like myself again. I have a hard time with all of these weird to me emotions. 

The kids and I are taking a vacation next week, and it will be great. I worry about all the what if's and how's but I have just chosen to look my fears in the face and do something fun. I want to be brave and adventurous. We are going with some of my siblings, parents and a lot of extended family so it should be an amazing time.