38 weeks

Got greeted by my children this morning with a "Merry Christmas Eve!!" Ruby made waffles for everyone while I got showered for my appt. Eli was very excited about a car ride and we headed on our way. I stopped by my parents to drop the kids off and visited with my Mom and Dallen for a few minutes. And then headed on my way to the hospital, the parking lot was quite empty.

I put on an 1 1/2 lbs. totaling 41. I peed on a stick, had my blood pressure taken which was right on the boarder today, am measuring at 43 weeks. Jax's heart rate was 145 and I had fun visiting with Melanie.

The Doc came in and we talked about the results of the ultrasound, he said he was very surprised by the results but said chances are still good by the time baby gets here he could be 8 lbs, then said "7,8,9 lbs is no problem for you. So do you want to have your baby next week?" I asked if Friday was an option, and he said he could do Saturday as I will be 39 weeks on Saturday and the hospital and he won't induce before 39 weeks. He will be on call for the weekend so he told me he needed to go out and make a call. He called L&D and gave them all of my information and got us all scheduled for Saturday. The only way it won't happen then is if there is a slew of pregnant ladies who come in, then my priority would drop and we would have to wait until Monday. I am crossing my fingers that other ladies babies will want to hang out for a while longer so we can go in on Saturday. :)

When I came back to get my girls, Ruby came over and patted me on the tummy and said "So, how did the appointment go?" And then she ran and told Emma the news who when she is excited screams. It was funny.

It seriously feels so long since we had a new bay bay. The first 7 months always go so slow for me and the last 2 months has gone so quickly particularly the last 4 weeks. We are all very excited to welcome Jaxon into our home and start our new adventure.

Waiting, prep, and fun.

It would have been quite comical to see me on Friday, I was like a teenager waiting for the phone to ring...and waiting...and waiting...The day went so slow! My Dr. said he would call me to get things set up with the hospital for delivery. He never called. I am sure when I talk to him on Tuesday he will get an ear full I have already prepared my speech.

"You don't write, you don't call..." that is about as far as I gotten, chances are actually pretty good I won't say anything. I was kind of figuring since the baby was measuring on the smaller side(for me) that I kind of moved down the list of priority and there wasn't any rush to set anything up. I will be going in for my 38 week appt on Christmas Eve so I have been telling myself that  things will get set up then. I haven't ever gone into labor on my own, I would like to experience that but I know what my body does and I could well go two weeks over my due date.

Dallen came home from Japan on Friday night! It was so wonderful to see him, he was pretty tired because he had been traveling for over 26 hours. It was so fun to laugh with him again about things that only we think are funny and only references we get. He also gives excellent hugs and has to bend way over to give me one since he is a foot taller than I.

I have been getting eager to put away my maternity clothes and I had a dear friend a few months ago who cleaned out her closet and gave me some really cute items that will work beautifully for post pregnancy and nursing. So I got into my closet and got everything organized and put a few things away that I don't wear anymore and got to bring out new things for afterwards, it was an exciting feeling.

I was released from my calling as 1st councilor in the Young Woman's presidency in my ward. It was bitter sweet. I knew it needed to happen because of all of the things going on in our family. There are so many things that we are juggling that something needed to drop, and this is the one thing that I could let go without the world falling apart or something else important being neglected. I also felt that the calling required more than I could give at the moment and that didn't seem fair to the girls or to the presidency I was serving with. It is hard to let go, but I feel extreme peace about it and that it was right.

We got Jax's carseat out of the closet, I was thinking it would need to be assembled having never experienced a new carseat, instead it just needed to be pulled out of the box and Eli was thrilled to test it out. It is amazing how these little ones grow. He will be 4 in just a couple of months and it is incomprehensible to me that he once fit in a carseat that size and  had to pass the carseat test before he could go home because of his 02 levels being very inconsistent in the hospital. Where does the time go? It is also interesting to me that basically the spacing between Eli and Jax will be basically the same amount of time as Ruby and Eli so I had 3 children in that time period. It is interesting to think about.


It is really ironic that all the things I worried about in the beginning have kind of worked themselves out. Every time I worry or wonder about something, I just remember the sacred experience I had in the Temple as I was praying about the decision to have another child. Time and time again, Heavenly Father has kept his promise and I get hit with the realization that He really does know what is best for us and that He will help us all along the way. The girls have become such good helpers, especially with Eli, they read to him, help him in the tub, clean up when he spills something, the list is endless. Eli has also grown leaps and bounds and is coming along, he is such a sweet boy and his speech is just exploding. It has been very exciting to see. We will have a transition of course, but it will go so much better than I thought.


Jed built a fort with the girls yesterday while I went and did our big Christmas and post baby stock up so that meal time is simple. It was fun going by myself, kind of like a last hoorah. I cringed when I got to the register though. I have never spent that much at Costco, but I know that my family will be eating well and taken care of and I can just focus on the essentials for a few weeks.

Eli loves "nets" anything with a pattern that criss crosses or anything like that he loves. Last week he came in to our room after waking up dragging his "bednet" (blanket) and gave it a hug and said "I love bednet' and kissed it. He is so sweet, I was preparing to get our ham into the crock pot and was looking at the instructions and I gave the netted bag to Eli and he put it on his head. We were calling him lunch lady.

I am so grateful for my little people, they are each so special and loving. Glad they are mine. Emma made my bed this morning and Ruby has been cuddling Eli. 

Ultrasound results and stuff

I drank my water and by 9:30 I had to pee. They insisted that it takes 1 hour for the water to hit your bladder. Hogwash! I was walking hunched into the hospital and taking bird steps because it hurt so bad. Not to mention I was trying very hard not to slip the lovely slush storm that hit this morning.

I got to the front desk and informed them that I was all ready to go, and about to wet my pants. They asked if my bladder was full. Little jokesters. I told them that I would just stand in the corner because sitting put pressure in places I didn't need it. I am sure they love my candor. Not a minute later the ultrasound tech came out and called for me. Then she said "Your last name is Christensen right?"  I said nope and she checked her charts and said "Oh, there is two Ashleys in a row. Your not here for your 20 week?" Nope, I replied here for my 38 week weight check. She did a quick look around and whispered, "We will take you back first, 20 week checks take a lot longer and I have her out there drinking her water." I rejoiced!

Jax is weighing in at 7.1 lbs, and is currently swimming in 16 cm of amniotic fluid which is excellent. His swimming pool is nice and full. :) It was fun as she was measuring his head we could see his hair floating in the water. It was pretty cool!

The appt was quite quick and I was going to head back to my moms house, As i was coming down the hill I was going slow and braking but I slid into the back of a stopped truck. I was horrified. Gratefully I am ok and I didn't bump my belly or anything else. Jax was moving around well afterwards so I knew he was ok. I punched the hitch through my bumper and pushed the bed of the guys truck forward. he was very nice, as it so happens he was just up at the hospital having their baby checked for weight as well. It was comfortable having something to talk about, and he kept telling me not to worry and that it was just cars, and life happens, we are both ok and that is all that matters. It could have been so much worse and I am so thankful we are both fine.

It took over an hour and half to wait for the police and get things sorted out. I am so lucky I didn't get a ticket. My SIL picked Emma and Eli up at my house and got Eli off the bus and I was able to meet her right as she was getting them out of the car. She seriously saved my bacon.

Dr. will call tomorrow and we will get my induction set up. :) Looking forward to it. :)

37 weeks

I was up at 2 a.m. this morning and Sir Jaxon was all sorts of busy. Being the good wife that I am, I woke Jed up because I was tired of being awake by myself, and talked to him for a bit and then let him go back to sleep. I too eventually went to sleep at 4.

My dr. appt went splendidly, I didn't gain any weight this time, I was sure I would after  my toast and blackberry jam marathon, santa clause sugar cookie and fudge the scale would be pointing it's numbers of judgement at me. Not gaining anything was nothing short of a Christmas miracle. :)

I am measuring ahead still but I forgot to ask how much because I had other questions I wanted to ask. I just have to say how much I enjoy nurse Kerrie very much. It is like visiting with a friend before I see the Dr. I am going to miss her when my reg visits come to a close.  I asked her how essential it was for me to drink the 16 oz before my ultrasound on Thursday and assured her that I was worried I would pee my pants at this point if I had to hold it that long, she said that the ultrasound tech would send me out to drink more water and wait if my bladder wasn't properly filled, so it was just better to do what was asked of me. She helped me work out a little plan, to just skip my 7:30 drink a thon. I drink probably 3/4 of a gallon everyday. I do love me my water. My blood pressure is excellent and Jaxon's heart rate is good.

I had an internal check and I am still dilated to 1 cm and effaced 60 % quite standard for me to stick around those numbers. I asked the Dr. if Jax was head down last week because I forgot to ask and he said yes, but he did a double check from the inside and also from the outside, as he did so I burst out laughing. I covered my face to get control of myself and apologized. He said it was fine, and I am sure he has seen all sorts of outburst in his office.But I was quite mortified, gratefully the good man is in his 60's and went to medical school with my uncle, but still quite awkward when something you just can't seem to help happens.

I have my ultrasound on Thursday and I am quite excited. I have never seen a baby via ultrasound at this stage so it will be fun other than having a painfully full bladder. Can you tell that I am not looking forward to that part? Jed isn't able to come as he has work and is taking a certification test on his lunch break, so I invited my mom to come with me. It will be fun having her along. I love getting to see her for a little bit after my appts before I go home. She always treats me to lunch, I shant complain. :)

On the way out of the office I said sweet adieu to the gals at the at the front desk and let them know that I was all scheduled up to the end and she smiled at me and said "Just so you know you look fantastic." It made my day. I like nice words from nice people.

Christmas has come to mean more.

I have been thinking about the events of last year as, many of my cute Young Women have said to me "Wouldn't it be fun to have your baby on Christmas?!?!" I am quick to tell them no, it wouldn't be fun.

Last year Christmas eve started out bright and beautiful and fun. I posted this little tid bit on facebook

"Started our morning out right, participated in the mad dash to get the garbage out as the garbage truck was passing our house, when I got out there with intentions to wheel it across the street I found that a good samaritan moved it to the curb for me. Emma and i had the best dance party this side of Miami in our very own kitchen whilst noshing toast, and eli got into the festivities by swiveling ...his hips while reading the ensign and swigging crystal light. Ruby and Sir Romig are still taking a long winters nap. It's going to be a beautiful day, Heart full of gratitude for the next two days making memories with the people I love most. In other good news, stopped said Sir Romig from imbibing the whole bottle of gifted sparkling cider so the girls could have some since I always finish off all the goodie plates before anyone else can partake. He seriously could have finished it off in 5 seconds. He is a modern marvel and we are glad he is ours. Happy Christmas!!!"

 

By the afternoon Eli was not feeling very well, and was wanting to cuddle, which at that point was a sign that something wasn't right. We took the rest of the afternoon with a slower enthusiasm than normal but continued with our usual traditions and plans. Pizza for dinner, family movie and Christmas story and opening of Christmas Eve jammies. All the kids were in bed and I got into the tub. Jed came and got me and said he heard Eli throw up and he started having a seizure. His seizure have never lasted more than 5 minutes and this one wouldn't stop. As I got into my robe, Jed gave him a Priesthood blessing and we called 911. And they took him to the hospital. He seized for an hour and 40 minutes before they could stop it.  

Jed went with him, and I stayed until my parents could come be with the girls. My neighbor came and Sarah also came. She heard sirens and thought of us and immediately came. I left for the hospital and my parents came and stayed with the girls and then ended up taking the girls to their home for Christmas.

I still remember how frightening it was to come to the hospital and seeing our sweet Eli hooked up to all these monitors and oxygen. I can never take pictures, because it just hurts my heart to much to remember in that way, and it is all still so vivid in my mind. The pain, worry and fear of the situation was so real. There was a sweet hospital policeman that came in and brought Eli a little match box car, and we had many ward and family members checking on us even late into the night. Peoples goodness never fails to amaze me. He was transferred via ambulance to Primary Childrens because they couldn't treat him at the hospital he was at. 

They flooded him with seizure meds and he was pretty exhausted and sleepy. (He could barely walk the next couple days) We got Eli settled into his little crib and Jed and I were able to go to sleep at 5 a.m. 

Jed's parents came to see us Christmas day and my parents made Christmas special for my girls. It came down to that Eli had a seizure because he was sick and his body wasn't absorbing his medication properly. We were able to come home that afternoon. One of the residents was questioning the Dr. about his decision to let us go home, the Dr. assured her that he believed we knew how to take care of him and would do it well.  but And I felt so good to be home together as a family. I missed being with all my little ones on Christmas.

 

That was a gloss over of all the events but, having experienced that Christmas has come to mean more to me. Heavenly Father sent his Only Begotten Son, to desend below all things so that He could understand our pains, sins, weaknesses, and trials and help us along with compassion. At the darkest moments of our lives He knows how we feel and how to help us. He came simply because He loves us and wants us to return home to our Father. 

 

That night, I felt of my Saviors love and comfort.  I truly felt that He came just for me. Because I felt of His presence I could deal with the situation with peace, even though I was afraid. 

I am so grateful that Jesus Christ came to the earth to teach us how to live and love. He came to earth in such humble circumstances and lived a perfect life in simplicity. He healed the sick, caused the blind to see, the lame to walk and the deaf to hear. He preformed so many miracles while He was here and most importantly showed us the way. I love him. 

The day will come when He will come again and we will be able to be with Him if we so choose. He will dry all of our tears and we will know what He has truly done for each of us.

Here is one of my favorite Christmas songs ever. It sums up why for me Christmas has come to mean more.

36 weeks and a few days officially

Got to go to my appt this morning and things look great! Blood pressure is down and the protein in my urine is gone. I think last time was just a fluke. So all is well there. I wanted to close my eyes when I got on the scale at the office. I weighed in at 195. Always a good time, hoping that I can at least stay under 200. But if not oh well, I am kind of done being stressed about the scale. It seems like it doesn't matter what i eat or how I exercise because the weight just keeps coming on. Gratefully it drops pretty quickly afterwards.

I am measuring at 40 weeks, so now I am only measuring 4 weeks ahead. Jax's heartbeat is good and I got tested for group b strep today. I am dilated to a 1 and effaced 60%. All very normal for me.  Dr. gave me the "If you go into labor" pep talk, reminding me to come right in and so on.

I pre registered with the hospital and they set up a web pay pin for me and I would always get to the last step and it wouldn't allow me to finish. I talked to the lady in the office about it and she gave me a # to call but I decided to take matters into my own hands and just decided to take a little trip to the labor and delivery floor for a peek even though I knew they couldn't help me. :) They directed me down the hall and I went and took care of things in the main hospital in the registration office. They keep the L&

D on lock down to keep babies safe and I needed to go back though the locked doors to get back to my car.

There was a sign on the door the wall that said "Press intercom and wait for nurse to respond" which I did and after a full minute someone came on and said "Don't just press the button tell me what you need." I felt like telling her to change the sign, then someone who worked in the hospital flashed their badge and went through. So I just followed. She said to me "You should probably wait for them to buzz you through." I explained that I was coming from registration and just needed to get back to my car. She then was telling me "They keep it on lock down to keep the babies safe, not that I think you are going to do something crazy." I apologized and just continued on. 

It was really fun seeing the L&D again. I haven't been there in almost 4 years. They have totally remodeled and it sparked my excitement as I was feeling quite scared since I had some crazy dreams. We also read a Christmas story a few days ago about a families baby that died at Christmas time and then 20 years later they had a granddaughter born 20 years later on Christmas day and the contrast of those two occurrences. Emma cried and cried and was so upset, and asked "What if that happens to our baby? I don't want our baby to die. I want to have a big family and lots of brothers and sisters." I felt so bad and wished I would have read through it first. It forced us to discuss things that are scary and a possibility.

I have also been trying to calm my nerves about BF. I am such a spas. Surprise. :)

36 weeks

We had a snow storm through the night and multiple people were posting on facebook how awful the roads were, and it took Jed 90 minutes to get to work when it normally takes 30, plus they closed the road I needed so I could get to my appt. which on a good day it takes at least 40 minutes. So I did the smart thing and cancelled my appt. I am quite sad about it. :( I look forward to knowing what is going on with our little Jax. So alas we will just have to wait until next week. I really am praying that the weather isn't so bad so that I  can make it to my next appts.

                                          
It is mind boggling to me that it is birth month, but am so excited at the same time. Jed told me that my belly is getting to the point that it looks like I am ready to pop and I said "It's quite big isn't it." He just smiled at me and said it is beautiful. He makes me feel happy. He is out of school for just this week and then will go back to 2 weeks and then will have 2 weeks off until the holidays are over. We will enjoy him while he is here. I am going to miss him greatly when he has to go back after the holidays and we have a new baby and it is up to me to take care of everything. :( Oh well grateful for all his hard work. 

We had a great weekend with family, we spent Thanksgiving at Todd and Megs home, the girls and I traveled to Tremonton to go to my dads side of the families get together and Saturday we took the girls to Frozen for their birthdays, got a bite to eat and took Ruby for her surprise to get her ears pierced. It was a fun afternoon. She was so nervous and was shaking and squeezing my hand so tight as they were sanitizing their gloves and preparing the gun. When it came time for it to be done they had two people do it at once so she didn't have to be afraid of the next ear being pierced. She is enjoying them a lot and I think it makes her feel like a lady. :)
 

We also had our friends the Kieffers over on Sunday for an evening treat and a visit. They have 7 children who are so well behaved you don't even know you have that many children in your house. We had a fantastic time chatting with them and greatly enjoy their friendship.

Eli really enjoys coloring and we have been working on coloring on just paper and not on the walls. It is coming along. He also loves to call for Emma when he sees something fun from the window, like the garbage truck. He will say "Emma look!" and she comes running and will stand by him at the window.

 

Jed was called to be the primary chorister in our ward and has been in for 2 weeks. When he received the call I think he felt that it was very out of his comfort zone, but has come home the last two weeks with a smile on his face and last week beardless. He let the kids help him shave his beard off if they could guess what he changed about himself and were singing well. He is a brave soul.

Lady Emma's Birthday

6 years has passed since Miss Emma made her debut. She is such a delight! We woke up and she wanted to watch Power Rangers(Oh brother) while I made pancakes. She stayed in her pajamas for half the day, requested homemade pizza with Canadian bacon for dinner and double layered red velvet cake for her dessert.

Our sweet neighbors brought Emma a gift of markers and  a coloring book. She had fun doing that while Eli took all the lids off and gave himself some body art. She eventually locked herself in the bathroom so he could color without "Eli drying her markers out."

We also took a late afternoon walk to the park, at Ruby's suggestion. She seems to know what helps me shake the afternoon grumpies. (Eli broke the ear off of my nativity set donkey. I stayed calm but felt the grumpishness inside.) Emma rode her bike to the park, and Ruby and I talked while Eli rode in the stroller. We had a great time, and I love that Emma's outfit consisted of a long sleeve shirt, a pair of capri's and snow boots on the wrong feet. She loves to dress herself, and it feels really to be able to put my control freak side on the sidelines and let her do it. :) We had a great time, but didn't stay too long because the sun was starting to set and it was getting cold.

We came home to Jed's car in the drive way. It was so happy! He took care of everyone while I got Emma's pizza made, and was able to get Eli to eat. We opened presents. One of which was really sweet Ruby made Emma a gift from items she had laying around and wrote her a really sweet card.  Emma got some church shoes, so now her smelly moccasins can be tossed in the dust bin. I am thrilled, and she got Scooby doo action figures. She has the most marvelous imagination. She will have a great time with them. We are taking the girls out for their birthday outing this weekend, but more on that later.

Here are a few words to describe Emma:
-Happy
-Kind
-Fierce
-Loyal
-Sweet
-Determined
She is our peace maker and truly helps make our home a Heaven on Earth, as long as she isn't getting sent to bed early or in trouble. If that is the case watch out, that little lady gets fierce. :)

34ish weeks

Had my 34 week appt today, I was in such a rush to get little people out the door and didn't have time to eat breakfast officially, so I quickly had a half a glass of carnation instant breakfast. Right as Eli's bus pulled up, I was doubled over the sink throwing up and peeing my pant at the same time, during which I was instructing Emma to get Eli's coat on. It was a wonderful morning, and no time to change since I have a long drive to the dr. office. So I turned on the heater in the car and hoped for the best.


When I got to the appt my pants weren't completely dry and I totally confessed because i didn't want her to think that pant peeing was my standard style. Were good friends she and I, were on a first name basis. :) She laughed and told me it happens more often than I think, most people just don't own up to it.

I put on 4 lbs, and I had to pee yet again and forgot to pee properly on the stick and so had to make due with what was left. I have a little protein in my urine, but nothing to worry about at this point. Blood pressure was borderline being high. 138/78 I thought for sure it would come down since I have been exercising religiously.

I have been having braxton hicks, my chatch aches, and I swear I have dropped. All of these things are new to me and I wonder about the possibility of me going into labor on my own. We shall see.

My Dr. was on vacation this week and the nurse that was covering for him told me I don't look 34 weeks along, even though I am measuring at 38.  I wanted to hug her. 

I have been feeling really great otherwise. We got the babies room set up and when we let Eli in to see he grabbed his blanket and asked to "get in" he was sad we wouldn't let him, by the end of the day though he was saying "babies room" the bedding and decore came from my sil Meg. It is so cute and I am really excited about it.

I am really determined to breastfeed this time and be successful at it. I told Jed I am stealing the recliner and putting it in Jaxon's room when he is born, since we have kids in and out of the house all the time, I don't want the girls need for sociality to suffer because of me and our house is the hub for playing at.  Being a little tucked away sounds better to me. I also found out that our insurance will pay for a breast pump as long as we get it from the hospital. I am hoping it will increase my chances of success.

 6 weeks to go, a little less I think. I am getting giddy. The girls are excited too and I find Emma reading my pregnancy pamphlets that came from our insurance. She is such a cutie.

Gratitude turkey and keeping it real

We got our annual Gratitude Turkey done on Sunday evening. Ruby and Emma traced all the feathers and cut them out. They did a great job and it is so fun to have both of them at a point where they participate.

These were our gratitude's this year, Jed's family at Thanksgiving each get 3 kernels of corn and says what three things they are specifically grateful for that year. I love this tradition because it is so easy to just see the big things, but I really love giving it deep thought and seeing how we have been blessed in a unique way each year.

Jed
1.Job
2.Family
3. Gospel

Ashley
1.Healthy Pregnancy
2.EMC(2)
3. Mr. Romig's hard work and dedication

Ruby
1.Nature
2.Service
3.Forgiveness

Emma
1.Family
2.Friends
3. Jesus

Eli
1.Crayons
2.Baths
3. School

Ruby in particular has been very interested in how babies are actually born. We had a really honest and open talk last night about  how it works, she also wants to know how the baby survives with out being able to breath inside me, she is very curious and thoughtful about the whole process.  When we found out we were expecting she wanted to know how a baby is made. We explained in general terms and showed her a video from pregnancy.com it was a lot of new info and I think she still doesn't have a very clear idea but is content.

I am grateful that she feels confident to come to me and trust that I will answer her questions honestly. I have always told her that if she has questions that I want her to come and talk to me about them instead of talking to her peers and getting wrong information. I am so grateful for that trust she has in me, and that my mom raised me the same way, I never felt weird asking her things because she didn't act awkward about it and make a big deal she just answered my questions it worked great . I am thankful I can do the same with my kids. I did explain to Ruby that the things we talk about are personal and she doesn't need to talk to other kids about it, or share what she knows because that isn't her responsiblity.

I was really proud of her this morning when we were driving carpool and the other kids were talking about how their mom has to stay in the hospital for 24 hours after having a baby so she can get feeling better from the shot she was given and how it is like recovering from dental work. :) Ruby just listened and kept her info to herself. I like her a lot.

Early Nov. Happenings

We have been keeping pretty busy with little things here and there. My girls went to a sleep over with all the girl cousins at my parents last Friday night and Eli went to a babysitters. This provided an opportunity for Jed and I to go on a real live date, and not just a date at home. It was glorious! We had so much fun just being together, browsing through stores and it opened the gate to talk about things that we don't normally. It was lovely, it is in the game plan for us to go on a get out of the house date at least once a month.

This little outing also provided us with an other amazing gift. We found the most perfect babysitter ever!!! We have hired girls here and there, but have found that they are overwhelmed with Eli. Which is perfectly ok, I get that. I have hoped and prayed for a long time that the right girl would come along that would just love him and enjoy her time with him and the girls. We totally found that in Kallie, she is one of my YW and I love her so much.  I can now feel confident to go places without worrying  how he and the sitter are doing. She is a gift, seriously a gift.

A few days after Halloween I pureed the pumpkins and  froze it, so we can enjoy pumpkin pancakes and other pumpkin favs through the coming months.

Before Jed's parents left on their mission, Jed's mom gifted her wrapping paper and and ribbon to us. As I was sorting through it I found some clear glass ornaments among the mix. The kids and I have taken spare moments to cut ribbon and fill the ornaments it will be a fun additon to our tree this year and was a fun way to remember Grandma and Grandpa Romig while they are away.


I signed up with our insurances maternity program strictly for the gift card I get at the end. I have a nurse that calls me a couple times for the rest of the pregnancy and she just asks me questions and gives suggestions and such. She was very nice and we talked about the possibility of having a c-section and she asked me if we had considered having my tubes tied while the Dr. was "in there" since this was my 4th baby. I told her no, that I didn't think we were done and that for as young as I was the permanence of that was too frightening for me. She was from back east and I think this took her a little off guard. I am an open book so I had no problem answering all her questions, and different scenarios.

We also set a few goals for me for the next 8 weeks. I promised her I would exercise at least 3 times a week, I have been doing a Leslie Sansone walk tape and I hold 3 lb weights while I do it. It is quite pathetic how sweaty I get but I can see the benefit of it. I also told her I would be more careful with my sweets and carb  intake. I do love my sweets.

I had a baby shower last night that was thrown by my sweet friends Stephanie and Kerrie, it was low key just like I hoped and they had the most delicious chocolate desserts. I got so many cute things for Jaxon. I think I forgot how cute baby things are. It is kind of surreal to me that I am going to have a baby in a little over 7 weeks that will be wearing these things. It feels like it has been such a long time since we have had a baby. But I am so excited!

Halloweensk

Halloween was a fun day, I took a nap on accident and I liked that. :) The girls enjoyed being in the Halloween parade at school, Emma was delighted that Eli's bus driver dressed up as Mario, and that she got a treat from his other bus driver when Eli got home.

We painted pumpkins with the kids the night before. Jed helped them outline their designs. I like that he is more artistic than I. Emma painted a Flash symbol, Ruby a Batman symbol and Eli wanted numbers on his pumpkin, he would dictate and I would paint.

Jed had school last night so the kids and I went it alone. My neighbors were really nice to let us tag along but somewhere along the way, all of their kids did their own thing and Gary and Corrine stayed with us, I greatly appreciate them.

Emma would always come back and report to me when people told her she was cute. I am sure Eli caused many a back ache in our community as those who were passing out candy had to shift positions multiple times to get comfortable while he was taking his sweet time deciding what he wanted. He was very selective. Ruby explained Halloween to him while we were all cuddling in bed the other day, and taught him how to say trick or treat.

We cut the evening short and came home a little before 8, my ankle was killing me. Ever since I broke my leg it acts up at really random times and hurts so we all came home had one treat and got everyone into bed. I ended my evening with a hot bath and the last two episodes of Call the Midwife. I am finding at this point I sleep much better if I stay up a little bit later.

Today we will be sorting candy. I make the kids put away 24 treats for their advent stockings for Christmas, that whittles down their stash a bit and makes for more even eating and it keeps me in line with my cheapskate lifestyle. :)

30 weeks

Normally when I get to my Dr. office they get me right back. It was quite difficult this time though, cause I had to wait for 40 minutes and this mama had to pee. Gratefully I got some fun text updates from Kim about her appt to keep my mind off the waterworks.

Everything is looking good, measuring 7 weeks ahead now and I gained 3 lbs. Feeling most accomplished I really want to stay within my last 10 lb goal we set.  Baby is super active and sometimes I swear he is up in my ribs, the girls love to feel him move around and Eli likes to give my belly loves and then he sticks his face right up next to it and screams. Perhaps then it won't be such a shock to Jax as to the noise level he will be coming home to. :)

I have all my appt scheduled now, and with that being done it feels like I am in the final stretch. My weight check ultrasound is scheduled for the 19 of Dec. and then we can make plans as to what needs to happen. I also have my last appt on the Christmas Eve which will be fun, and a little excuse to get up to my mom's house and see her in the morning.

I am also feeling extremely blessed, Jed came home last night and told me that his company has holiday pay that he has to use or lose before the end of the year. Absolutely splendid timing! We were just planning on him taking it off without pay. This however is a much better alternative.

Today I let Ruby take my picture before she left for school, apparently I have  puffed up like a toad. I am going to just say that it is my hair and the scarf. Yes that is what it is. The wardrobe choice is to blame. I will be firing my assistant today. :)

Also my new latest past time is entertaining Mr. Romig with my insane dreams while he is getting ready for work and while I am just waking up. My latest dream entails Jed hijacking a UTA bus and taking us all to his work and then telling me to drive it home and that he would appreciate me  picking him up.

I stopped by my moms house before I headed back home and it was so cute finding my dad in the kitchen with my mom baking 50 dozen cookies for the Scouting commemoration tonight. It was his idea to have them come unbaked(I think it saved him like 50 %) so he chose to stay home and help mama get them all baked. They are cute.

Students of the month and the usual

In the past two months, Emma and Ruby have been recognized as students of the month. I didn't get a picture of Emma on her special day because we had to rearrange the time for us to come in and see her get her award because Eli had a neurology appt. Emma was recognized for being an excellent student and Ruby was recognized for being a hero and not a bully.

I was very hesitant to take Eli to the award ceremony, but did anyway. He did quite well. :)


Eli loves getting his picture taken, and will readily say cheese and get as close to the camera as he can. He has also really enjoyed reading certain books. His two favorites right now are "It's not easy being small" and "The sad mule" I like when we read the sad mule because he loves to say "Not Cuuuttte" Another funny little tidbit is that he loves to run around in his diaper if we are home and just wants his clothes off, I allow it as long as he will wear clothes outside the house. When Jed has late nights with school and Eli is having a hard time sleeping,(he won't come out of his room) I go and get him and he smiles and asks for "bednet" We have a really cosy blanket on our bed from Jed's mission that has an eagle and a motorcycle and he thinks the wings look like a net. He immediately settles in and will stay put and go right to sleep. I will usually take a bath while he is going to sleep and when I am done I love coming and laying by him and watching him sleep. He is so precious.




We flaked on our wards chili cook off, Ruby mooched an invitation from the neighbors and Jed and Emma ended up going on a daddy daughter date to cold stone to use her gift card from Christmas. They had a great time, and really do look forward to having him home.Jed informed me that he and Emma had a good chat about Emma's like of giving boys kisses on the cheek in kindergarten.

We have had a fun time playing games with the girls in the evening once Eli goes to bed, (he can't leave the pieces alone) some of our favorites are Quirkle, Authors and Incan Gold. I love watching their faces as they check their cards, or as the wheels in their head are turning as they decide what the best move is, and the verbal expressions they come up with. It has also been a great opportunity to teach the girls about being good sports. It seems that we have bred incredibly competitive children.

Let's hear it for the boy

I am way late posting this, but I just wanted to give Sir Jed a shout out. There is so much I can say but perhaps that I am extremely proud of him sums it up nicely. It feels like he has been in school for forever. He did three years at the U doing undergraduate work going towards his accounting degree, got in the wrong class and found out it would be a waste of money and time, so he took the semester off and came to realize that he hated punching numbers and being behind a desk. (Which is what he did for work already) So he took a break for a while and then life happened, his job closed and the economy was a doozy, Eli was going through a lot of scary health things and we really struggled to stay afloat. We lived off our savings, and doors just didn't seem to be opening. Let's just say it was a crapshoot of a time. Because of the goodness of Heavenly Father and so many loving people around us we made it through, we really have been blessed to have what we have needed since that fateful day in 2010. I truly believe that experience has been good for us and has been the means of lifting us higher and really learning to trust the Lord and learn to ask for help and put our pride aside.

Fast forward a year and Jed realized that we were never going to be ok with out him finishing his college education. He really wanted to be a teacher but knew such a degree would not satisfy our families needs. So he put his dream on the shelf and really did some soul searching and praying about what needed to be done. He decided that Web administration and Information systems was the path he should go. He got registered, and has worked his butt off, working full time, going to school at night and having a busy church calling. In June of this year he received his associates in Web admin and has started the program towards his bachelors for Information systems.

He runs off very little sleep and has worked so hard. His GPA has never been lower than a 4.0 and he has done all of this with very little complaint. I love the boy for all that he has done and is doing. The girls always ask when daddy is going to be home and love when he is here on Wednesday nights (this semester) I often remind them that when he is not here it is because he loves them and is doing school and work so he can take care of us.

Since Jed went back to school he has wanted to work for EMC and went through a grueling month long interview process with them 2 years ago and then told they couldn't hire him because he didn't have his degree. So now that he has his degree he interviewed with them during the summer and was their #2 pick because the Linux system was his weak spot and happened to be the expertise of the interviewer, however he was told they wanted him to interview again in September and EMC came back to Jed's school at the end of August to meet with their "brightest students" Jed made that list and happened to meet with the same man who interviewed him during the summer. They had a really good hour long chat and he was told they would be in touch. 2 weeks later while I was busy setting off all of the fire alarms in the house while cooking stew meat Jed was taking a phone call from EMC about a job offer. This has been such an incredible blessing to us.

I really do believe that there is so much to learn as we wait for answers to our prayers. Just because they are not answered in the way we want them to be does not mean that we have been forgotten or forsaken, just perhaps that the timing isn't right. I am so grateful for this season in our lives where at times the lessons have been painful but ultimately the growth and learning has been great. God really is in the details and loves us more than we can possibly realize.

And for my closing remarks. Jed Romig is a fox, even though he will probably not ever see this, thank you for all you have done and continue to do for our family, you constantly astonish me and complete my life. I think you are nice and I like you. Congratulations on all of your accomplishments and for working towards your goals.

Uh almost 10 weeks have past.

Time has gone quick, sometimes it feels like it is going slow every time I see "what to expect when your expecting" in my room. I will be 28 weeks in 2 days and here is just a few tidbits.

-I have 11 weeks left, Dr. promised Jaxon would be here by the end of the year. Anywhere from the 27th to the 30th depending on what openings the hospital has.

-I am measuring 8 weeks ahead, but baby is measuring right on via ultrasound

-My concern about Jaxon having the same health problems as Eli was discussed with his neurologist and she said that chances are very low. So we should just plan on Jax being healthy.

-I will have an ultrasound at 38 weeks to see what the size of the baby is. I may have to have a C-section, and Dr. said if baby is showing to weigh around 9 lb then I can go for a vaginal delivery. If it is showing at 10 lb we should very seriously consider a C-section. I asked how they come up with the number just by a picture and he said they measure all parts of the baby and then make a calculation which can be a lb off in either direction. ( I am praying to avoid a c-section, for no other reason then I don't feel like I would be able to give Eli what he needed, and that worries me greatly, like getting him on and off the bus, helping him out of the tub, taking him down to his room when he needs time out, being able to help him up so I can hold him, I truly am a worry warthog, plus I don't want surgery. Everyone else would be ok.)

-I have put on 25 lbs so far which was the goal for the entire pregnancy but that has never happened to me before. I always go large and in charge. So we set a goal for me to gain another 10 lbs. That seems doable.

- I love seeing posts and blogs from good friends who are having their babies, I get giddy waiting for my turn, and I dream about the yummy smell at the hospital. :)

- I am feeling really great, just big. Jax moves a lot and just the other day I was able to feel a verifiable firm baby part pushing against my tummy from the outside. Couldn't honestly tell you what part, but a part none the less. :)

-I am also finding that the only way I can wear any maternity jeans is to roll any panel down to unmentionable levels. I am carrying him so low and and nothing fits right. I had a nice friend from my ward offer some things of varying sizes which will be really nice because my current wardrobe is not going to cut it for much longer.

18 weeks

My 18 week appt was good. I put on a whopping 9 lbs in a 4 week period, but don't feel too terrible about it. Everything is looking good, however when they measured me I was measuring at 22 weeks which is 4 weeks bigger than I should be. I did the exact same thing with Eli. My Dr. wasn't in so I just met with the nurse, I came away from the appt feeling ok, but the more I have thought about it, I have 3 thoughts running through my head

1. My baby space is probably just stretched out, from boy boy. (I have had multiple neighborhood children look at the 10 week ultrasound on the fridge and exclaim "wow! that looks like a Mickey Mouse head!" in reference to the baby's hangout location.

2. I had a moment of fear thinking that because this baby is measuring the same way Eli did, they may have the same health problems. Jed was most reassuring that if that is what happens, we have done it once before and we are given that challenge by a loving Heavenly Father who knows what we are capable handling. I like him.

3. It may be a boy, I have been so sure it is a girl but perhaps if they are growing at this rate we may have another boy.

Taking it all in stride and will be interested to hear what my Dr. thinks at my 22 week appt. Our 20 week ultrasound is in 9 days. We are excited, our girls in particular.

I have made a list of things that I need to get done when the kids are back in school, but on Sunday I decided that I can't wait 2 more weeks so Monday we started, I cleaned my closet and purged a lot of junk, cleaned our room and sent Emma spelunking under the bed, and cleaned out our drawers. I also started in the spare room which is a disaster and full of junk. The floor was scattered with hundreds of broken crayons, and magnetic doll dress ups, I cleaned the closet and organized the hall closet.

Today we sorted the toy room, separating the girls stuff from Eli's and then went to eli's room and organized the toys, put away his pack and play, put away toys that were too young for him and set up a big boy bed for him. I have decided that I am going to do a week toy rotation for him because he gets overwhelmed and then doesn't really play with anything and it all just gets scattered. 

 My mama came this afternoon and we cut fabric for one of Eli's Christmas surprises. My mother is an angel to help me. She is such a dear woman and I am so grateful we are close. We played a game with the girls, I went to vote and i prepared dinner for a dear friend who just had a baby. I will be so happy when all of our messes are sorted we are excellent at making them.

I also think my favorite time of the day is reading a chapter of Harry Potter with my girls before bedtime. It is so magical and such a special time for us just to be together. they have been most excellent helpers and complimentors of dinner lately. I think I will keep them. :)

14 weeks

Had my 14 week appt yesterday. I only put on 3 lbs. so far. That is huge for me since usually I have put on at least 15 by now. Pee on a stick test went fine, blood pressure is good, it was so fun to hear the heart beat. The nurse heard it, and asked me if I did. I told her barely and she found it for me and it was good and strong.

I am measuring 2 weeks ahead, which means I am measuring like I am 16 weeks along. My Dr. was looking at my chart and was asking me to refresh him on Eli's birth and asked about some of his health problems, his nerve injury in particular. He said it was possible with him being so big that his nerves could have been injured simply by the vaginal delivery and possibly having to tweak his shoulders to get him here.  He also said we want to avoid that happening again and since baby is measuring ahead we are going to do an Ultrasound at 38 weeks to check for babies weight and may go the route of c-section if baby is extremely big again.

I feel at peace with that decision, as I would do anything to help this baby avoid any of the struggles Eli has had. I have often wondered if we would have just opted for a c-section with Eli if things would have been a little better for him, but it could not matter either way, and that this is Eli's package of challenges that he has been given.

Physically I am feeling great, but I am kind of a quiet grouch sometimes. Things annoy me more easily than they normally do. I don't like to let people see I am being grouchy and feel embarrassed when they do. It will be happy when I feel like myself again. I have a hard time with all of these weird to me emotions. 

The kids and I are taking a vacation next week, and it will be great. I worry about all the what if's and how's but I have just chosen to look my fears in the face and do something fun. I want to be brave and adventurous. We are going with some of my siblings, parents and a lot of extended family so it should be an amazing time.

About Emma

Emma loves to learn. Initially she wasn't going to be able to go to preschool, and a week before our trip, Learning Dynamics (which I love!) called and offered her a place free of charge. Tuition isn't cheap there either. I cried and cried because she wanted to go to school so badly, it has been such a great opportunity for her and she loved her teacher Mrs. Garrett and she has become an excellent reader. Here she is explaining the life cycle of butterflies.

Emma and Eli have such a special bond, she is one of his greatest protectors and defenders. Even when we are getting after him for a behavior we don't like, she defends him, and even gets emotional that he doesn't know better and we just need to be patient with him. I think there is like a 3lb difference between the two of them even thought  she is 2 1/2 years older than he is. He loves his Emma so very much.

 

Emma loves dressing up and is partial to the idea of being a super hero. Earlier this summer she was invited to a birthday party and there was an obstacle course and then they got to take a squirt gun and shoot the villains.She came home completely thrilled that she got to shoot each one of them in the face. She has so much spunk and gusto. 

Sometimes I cry

Sometimes I get to comfortable when Eli has a streak of good health. I forget too easy what it is too be afraid again, when he his out of my sight worrying about all the what if's, and the knots I get in my stomach as I watch that sweet little boy go through a seizure(s). This morning I got up early and put my oatmeal together and I just felt I needed to check on Eli. I went into his room and as I looked into his bed, his eyes were rolled into the back of his head, and he had saliva running out of is mouth and his arm was waving like he was leading music, and his little body was shaking. It was horrific, to see happen.

I quickly picked him up and carried him to the couch on his side and set a timer, in case he needed his rescue med. The minutes feel so long and I feel so helpless as I hold him all the while praying that the seizure will subside. It stopped after 2 minutes and Ruby came up and was sitting on the couch by me. His seizures make him tired. So he took a little 15 minute nap and at that point I realized that his meds were one the counter in the oral syringe and didn't get them before bed last night. I had Ruby grab it and I gave it to him slowly as he slept, as he woke he had another small one and I asked Ruby to run and get our neighbors. They are incredible, they were to our door in less than a minute. Gary and Caleb were able to administer a Priesthood blessing to Eli. So grateful to have worthy men so close when Jed is away.

As he snapped out of it, he asked to eat and kept saying "hide" and wanted to be covered with his blanket. My neighbors stayed and I went into the kitchen to get him some pancakes. He was in there with me and fell to the floor and had another small seizure. I hate it so much. It makes my heart so sad.

I was able to get him to eat after a little bit, and we were just waiting for the Neurology line to open at Primary's so I could leave a  message for the nurses. Normally it takes about 24 hours for them to get back to you, but they called me in about 2 hours and then they got a message over to his Dr. and she called me and we will be going in to talk about possible new med options or adding a second med, since he is pretty much maxed out on what he is on now.

Often the tutor in life is pain. Some lessons hurt so much, and yet there is value and importance in them. The greatest comfort I find when I am worried or crying about Eli is that Heavenly Father is in the details. Most of the time I don't have the answers to my questions, and the why's and how's but I know that the Lord's hand is in all things and we can trust Him. He cares about the things we care about. And for now that is enough.

summer happenings and 10 week apt.

We have had a great start to the week, Monday we went to the park with Whitty Kitty, and had an great afternoon, I had a fun visit with Kami and the kids had fun playing and Eli took a nap in a 5 point harness swing. He had the most peaceful look on his face.

Tuesday we headed up to Sandy for my Dr. appt and my sister was very nice to watch the kids for me while I was gone. She was also watching my neice and nephew so she was watching 7 children. When I got back she said " I am so happy to see you I could kiss you." If you know my sister that is the last thing on the planet she would want to do, so I knew she was glad to have me back. :)

My appt went great, after I got through the mountain of paperwork. I love Dr. L's office, they remember who I am and things about me and I like that. I got to see baby via ultrasound and saw the heartbeat. I am measuring a 5 days ahead but we will keep my due date of January 4th. I am really hoping to deliver before the end of the year. We shall see. I am scheduled appt wise up to my 20 week ultra sound in August.

Then it was off to the lab to have the maternity panel done. I told the girls that I would have to have blood drawn because they wanted to know what would happen at the appt. When Ruby heard they were going to have to put a needle in my arm and take my blood. she said "I am glad I found this out, before I started thinking about having babies."

The rest of the day was really fun. The girls had a great time being with their cousins, and I had a fun visit with Lady Erin and Sir Dallen.

Sometimes I feel crazy

In order to keep myself on  more even keel we set up a little schedule to help summer go more smoothly. It goes like this:

1. Breakfast
2. get dressed/shower
3. go for morning walk (the exersize really helps my mood swings) I like endorphins
4. Read scriptures together and have family prayer
5. Work time (the girls can earn 10 cents for each job they do) 
6. Each child reads to me for 20 minutes 
7. Fun activity ( get swimming pool out, make jam together, paint fingernails, ect)

We have been on schedule for 2 days, I am so proud. Sometimes it is tricky to say no when some of our cute little neighbor friends come to see if the kids can play or my children want neighbor friends to come on walks with us. I think the trick is, just being consistent and reminding the kids that it is family time. 

I find it very interesting that very seldom would Eli do something that completely frosts my cookies. I tend to think I am quite patient with him, but the combination of some of his quirks and my pregnancy hormones have made for some unpleasant moments. I get sad just thinking about some of my bad behavior. So I am trying to do better. Gratefully my children are patient and forgiving and Jed always tells me that there is nothing to feel bad about, that "it's not you, it's the pregnancy" He is nice and has been so super helpful. When we were contemplating another baby I told him straight out that I was going to need his help. I don't think he realized what he was getting himself into. :) But I am grateful that with all he has going on he makes time to help when he is here.

Jed has a 2 week break from school. Which I am most excited about, this last 3 1/2 months has been hard for me. I will also get to go to Young Womens activities, for the next few weeks and will also be getting away for a few days for Youth Conference. It will be the longest I have been away.

My kids love being outside, Ruby and Emma can mostly manage themselves and I don't have to worry about them too much, they know the rules and they are pretty good at following them .Mr. Eli however needs constant supervision. He has crossed the street a few times even when I have been out watching him, he also loves to put rocks down our neighbor's window well grates. He calls it the "net", his other joys include having the hose turned on just a little bit and being in charge of it, and jumping on our neighbors trampoline. I am secretly hoping that a trampoline will be in the cards for Christmas.

When I am outside watching Eli I have taken up reading books and indexing. Our youth have a summer challenge for indexing and there is a BBQ with the stake presidency and prizes involved. At the begining of the year I set a goal to index 5000 names and have set a goal to do 3000 in the contest period which will equal 50 names a day. I find so much joy and fascination in just seeing the names and how many children they had, if they had lodgers living with them and other things you can find out. It has been a great source of service for me and I feel happy when I do it. I love indexing. I would like to jump on the family history wagon.

I was 6 weeks on Sunday and blissfully thinking that I would escape "pregnancy revenge" It was wonderful thinking. I was at the park with some of my lady friends on Monday and started to feel the effects of it. I felt pretty nauseated the rest of the afternoon. the girls were out playing with friends and Eli wanted to go for a walk, so I figured moving would be good. Got back from our walk and I paid my dues to the porcelain throne. I texted Jed and said "I forgot how good it feels to throw up." :(

I made it through dinner and lounged on the couch for the rest of the evening, while Ruby was doing her eye therapy. Eli would come and pet my hair and get into my face and then turn and run, and then come back for more.

We made our announcement to our parents on Sunday, Mother's day. It was too hard to keep the secret from them because Jed sees his parents a few times a week in between work and school and I see my mom at least once a week. It was fun to tell them. My mom was confused, and my dad didn't say anything. (He had a long weekend and insisted it was because he was half asleep when I blurted it out there.)

When I told my parents I said

"So you are going to have another grandbaby."
-"Who is?"
"You are."
-"You are???"
"No you are,"
It was pretty funny.

Jed's told his parents by saying.

"What does winner, winner, chicken dinner, black jack and 21 meant to you?"

His mom immedately jumped out of her chair and started shouting "You are???? Are you serious? Are you really?" Her reactions never fail to make me smile and feel good

I think I am so sneaky (pregnancy posts)

Last Monday April 20th or something like that, I was in a crazy mood. My emotions were ridiculous, everything made me want to cry or get really angry. I hate feeling that way, I sent Jed a text and asked him if when he got home he could give me a Priesthood blessing. He asked what was up and I explained how I was feeling. He said absolutely he would. When he came home we chatted for a bit and then he gave me a blessing I felt much better and knew that the words came from the Lord.

The rest of the week passed fairly normal and come Friday evening I was feeling very down and depressed for no real reason. Things that were bugging me that normally wouldn't.I went to the neighbors to take a family picture of them after their race and when I got home I came and laid my head in Jed's lap and said  "I feel crazy do you think I could be?" He said it is possible but probably not. I do get a little flighty pre-lady time.  Things didn't seem quite right, so I crept to the bathroom and took out my favorite dollar store pregnancy tests, did my business and watched at the test worked it's routine function. I saw a very strong line and then a faint but still there line. I meandered downstairs to show Jed and asked is this what I think it is? He took a look and said "yes, yes it is." With a very large grin on his face.

I am terrible at keeping secrets about myself, however when I found out I was pregnant on my 26th birthday and then I miscarried a few days later, I couldn't bear the thought of telling people and then having to retell them the sad news. So I am keeping my secret for as long as I can, I really as so excited. Gentle reminders from Heavenly Father have come on many occasions that it was time for us to welcome a new baby into our family but I would always talk myself out of it saying that "The timing isn't right, or we have too much on our plate as it is." At the beginning of the year though these thoughts have come again and again and remembrances of previous reminders He has given us. We have fasted, prayed, visited the Temple time and again it has been made clear what it is we need to do. So I have put aside my fear and have replaced it with the faith that Heavenly Father wants us to be happy and knows best how to do that. I am grateful for His help in helping me get out of my own way because I like to think that I know what is best.

I really am so excited and it is fun having a secret.

I feel like I am kind of avoiding getting together with people because I am just bursting to tell someone, but I promised that I would wait until I am 10 weeks. I got together with a friend yesterday and I wanted to tell her but didn't.

I am feeling really good, like I did with Eli. Boy maybe? My mom came on Monday and I was being super careful to make sure there was no evidence lying around. I hung onto my prego test and I had to put that and my prenatals under the counter so she wouldn't see. While she was here the Dr. office called and I took the call in the bathroom, gratefully she didn't ask who it was. :)

I am trying really hard to eat well this time around because gaining 50 lbs a pregnancy isn't a good idea on a short frame like mine. And I can eat like no body's business. Like the time I ate a dozen cookies at night when I couldn't sleep when I was pregnant with Eli.

I never watch t.v. during the day, but I am finding I like to laze about in the afternoon and Eli will just lay by me and look at his book. It is a nice little arrangement.